Signing off For a While

Well, although blogging has been new to me and I have not been able to even figure out how to put bloggers that have supported me and offered me advice at my most sensitive moments , you are all in my hearts and soul, I read you every day. I don't always leave comments. Right now my life feels like it is falling apart more than I can really even handle. I need to remove computer time, phone time and focus on what is important to my family. My daughter is having some problems, physical and emotional, that I need to address. I have taken four days off to help deal with them to try to get to the bottom of some things, but have not made a lot of progress. Because all of you are my friends, and I know you care and are concerned, I will tell you, she is first of all 'Stool Holding', which has created some physical pain and some health issues. She also refuses to go in the toilet, I have up until about a week ago, offered her a pull up and let her do her thing. I have now removed that option so my home has been to say the least a challenge to keep clean. Also, a dear person in my life, her teacher, who is a mentor to me, has reminded me that things we discussed last year have not changed for the better. She has some inattention issues. I, myself, have diagnosed her with ADD, the inattention part of it, not the hyperactivity, so I am documenting some of my examples and will discuss at Tuesdays follow-up visit with her pediatrician. But here is my biggest issue of all, I blame myself and here I am typing this, feeling low and depressed, because I feel ultimately responsible. My sensitivities, my emotionalism, my inability to be here for her because of work. I have already looked into a leave of absence and this may be necessary down the road to deal with these problems, as I am a very important part of helping her with this. So my friends, know that your writings help me, make me smile, make me think of how I can change for the better, but my emotional energies and spirit will be with Kayla helping her 24/7 with anything I can do to make her feel better about what she is going through. I love all of you, and you have all helped me in more ways than you can imagine. I am not going to attach links here, with your sites, not enough time, but I will try to list all of you! (Melba, Caroline, Maryann, Suzie, Kerry, Jaimee) Please just think of me, if you have any words of wisdom for me, please help. I look to all of you for peace/ I know that we can get through this, I just feel so badly for my little one, like I cant figure out what to do as her mother to help her. I pray, my mom sends reike, we create all day long, we love and talk to eachother all day. I am going to start by writing a to do list that 'She creates" today and tell her that the only thing I want her to do is talk about what is bothering her. I know some of you don't have children, however, your experiences with people, sensitive people, may help you to understand, and also I know you all have such a deep love for life, and you know I do also, so you can imagine how this is affecting me. I am off to write my to do list for today, I may even have her write it herself. She is not in Kindergarten yet, but knows how to spell all the letters. I am proud of her in so many regards, she is really a creative sensitive soul and reminds me everyday that Daddy and I should kiss more! Thanks for listening!