Trip to the Farm

TODAY IS THURSDAY....I work 2-11 and in the morning, Kayla and I have mommy and kayla time. She has a class trip to a local farm today so we went. I had to get her out of bed because after school and karate last night, Mark took her to the carnival until 9:30. She was tired and didn't really want to be there with all the kids, so she kept off to her own. At first I was getting aggravated, but I decided, this is HER day too, HER trip to the farm. She wanted to go sit in the truck and get a drink. All the mothers were telling their kids that they had to wait until it was all over until they could. I decided, it is hot, buggy, smelly and Kayla wants a drink! So, I took her to the truck to get some cheeze-its and a drink. The mothers were all asking me what was wrong when I got back. Nothing! I simply said, Kayla wanted a rest and a few mintues to herself...She likes to be around the kids, but only when she is at school, when she is with me, she just wants mommy, and that is ok, because I want her just as much...I need to let her have her independence...she still had fun, she did things on her own...I always close my eyes when I am with her and just imagine what life was without her. She has brought a new dimension to my life. She has a sweet soul and a deep love for so many things in life. I felt a little lonely today with the whole group, but needed to step away from it and just realize why I was there. For her, so she could grow, experience something new and take from it what she decides to. I think her favorite part was going to the car with me! And that is ok! I loved it too! She was so sweet, she even said, mommy you can go and come back if you want, I will sit here alone....so thoughtful, so caring...My girl...I love her with the strongest passion I have ever felt in my life...I have to go to work now but Thursdays she gets dropped off at a friends for just 4 hours. She loves Susan, who has two little girls, Emily 8 and Elizabeth 11. She has such a good experience there. Tonight is Karate again for one hour, then 'Steak Dinna' with Daddy. They have been going since Kayla was born...every Thursday night....My Kayla and my Mark...what memories we have!